Chapter 40 - Dancing On My Own

Part 1.

> 👊 <

👻IDDIN
> 😈 <

Buat aku gila je ketawa seorang macam ni. I switched off my cellphone and went to bed.

The next morning after solat subuh, I woke Hans tapi liatnya dia nak bangun.

"Hans, I pergi beach and do yoga.....", aku mencuit-cuit hidung mancungnya.

"Hmmm....tak payah pergilah....rest saja. Stay in bed with me....", he said and pull back the covers over his head.

So I decided to go by myself. I brought along my Iphone and yoga mat. The walk to the beach took me only five minutes. Cantik betul suasana pagi ni.

The ocean is my favorite place for sunrise because the sun casts a pyramid of light from one tiny beam across the water just before it rises to show the arc of the ball of fire. Then, the whole sky becomes that dawn color, blues and oranges and yellows and reds all blending into one warm glow. 

Good Day Sunshine! Good Day Sunshine!! 

As the bright orange ball rises, I fight to block the blinding light but so wanting to keep the color of that morning for as long as possible. Everything is a more brilliant color now. I think of all those who bring me joy and those who have left this life but somehow MUST be involved in bringing this glory to me every morning.

I found a good spot and started with a few stretches and breathing exercise. I switched on to Spotify and searched for Calum Scott singing to Robyn's Dancing on my Own. Yeah, I'm on my own so....why not. It is a beautiful song on this breathtaking morning.

Credit You Tube and CalumScottVEVO

Somebody said you got a new friend

Does she love you better than I can?

There's a big black sky over my town

I know where you're at, I bet she's around

Yeah, I know it's stupid

I just gotta see it for myself

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh

I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh

I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the guy you're taking home, ooo

I keep dancing on my own

I'm just gonna dance all night

I'm all messed up, I'm so out of line

Stilettos and broken bottles

I'm spinning around in circles

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh

I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh

I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the guy you're taking home, ooo

I keep dancing on my own

So far away but still so near

The lights come on, the music dies

But you don't see me standing here

I just came to say goodbye

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh

I'm giving it my all, I'm not the guy you're taking home, ooo

I keep dancing on my own

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, oh no

I'm right over here, why can't you see me, oh no

I'm giving it my all, I'm not the guy you're taking home, ooo

I keep dancing on my own

So far away but still so near

The lights come on, the music dies

But you don't see me standing here

When I returned, most of the Hans staff were checking out of The Kabin. I saw Hans, Mom and Dad having breakfast by the pool. I walked over and joined them.

“Mana you pergi pagi-pagi ni, Atikah?”, Mom asked and all eyes were on me.

“Tak de mana, just walked to the beach. Enjoy the sunrise and do a bit of yoga.”, I replied and sipped mineral water from my bottle.

“Alone?”, again mom asked.

“Aha…..”, I replied.

Mom looked at Hans and slapped his arms, "Kenapa you biar Atika pergi alone? Hans, you should take care of Atika....", Mom scolded Hans.


"I know I should have but it was way too early. I did ask her not to go.", Hans tried to explain.

"Hish, macam ni ke jadi suami orang? Buat malu saja...", and Mom is getting more upset.

Aku yang memerhatikan perbualan anak beranak di depan aku, menyampuk, "Mom, it's okay. Hans was tired so I went on my own....".

Hans got up and came over behind me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me on my right cheek. "I'm sorry babe. I should have accompanied you.", and he kissed me again on my right cheek.

Part 2.

That whole afternoon it rained. Hans and I stayed indoors watching movies on You Tube. He made me tea and we ate junk food which he bought from The Kabin Cafe. We cuddled in bed and later fell a sleep. I was so happy to be in Hans arms and I couldn't be bothered with the outside world. 

When we were in bed we don’t just hold hands. Hans would trail his fingers along mine and spell out ‘ love’ on my palms, then he kissed the tips of each of my fingers as they’re interlaced with his. This is sexy without the sex and a great intimate activity. At times I nibbled his ear and kissed his neck, in between kissing sessions. Then he would lick a line down my neck and blow on it softly. The cool sensation blew me out of my mind.

I was told Mom and Dad left The Kabin sometime at noon that day. Late in the afternoon we went to the pool. The weather was much better and we had so much fun. We challenged each other to see who can swim the fastest from one side of the pool to the other. I had a terrific time and love the attention Hans gave me.

We checked out that night even though we have paid for the night stay. Hans wants to take me for furniture hunting tomorrow. I had no problem agreeing with his plan. Hans never let go of my hands all the way drive home to Cyberjaya. We stopped for dinner at Aroii Thai and after we arrived safely to our new home in Setia Ecoglades.

Part 3.

Hans and I sat at the kitchen island and discussed what to purchase tomorrow.

" So what do you think?" he showed me a few sketches which he drew on the spot. " We'll have all bedroom cabinets and shelving custom made." he added.

"Looks awesome. I like it but I would love if you could add a lounge chair and an island accessories high table in the middle of our dressing room." I said and looked at him.

Perbincangan berlarutan hingga tengah malam. I was quite tired and asked Hans, "Where are we going to sleep...... We don't even have a bed."

"Jom, kita naik atas....", and he held out his hand. I took hold of his hand and followed him upstairs. We walked straight into our bedroom and there laid alone a sofa bed right in the middle. The room was lighted with a table lamp places on the marble floor.

I smiled and walked closer next to Hans. "Creative.", I said and giggled. "So now, if you don't mind I want to take a hot bath then straight to bed....". I hugged him and in returned he kissed me lightly on my lips. "Teaser.....", I said to him. He smiled and let go of me.

I took off my clothes and start to build up water in the tub. A cap full of jasmine oil......again the temperature must be just right. I let my hair down and looked at the mirror. My baby bump has grown and that reminded me I have a doctor's appointment with Doctor Idris in a week's time. I think I must be reaching my third month of pregnancy. I rubbed the bump and thinking what will be the sex of my baby. If it were a girl I will definitely have a circus buying her pretty clothes. And if it is a boy, I will spoil him with blocks of Lego so he can become an architect just like his father.

I switched on to Spotify searching for Bebel Gilberto and increased the volume. I sunk into the tub. Closing my eyes to the water as the heat soaks into my skin, "Hmmm...oh yeah.....feels so good...." I said softly as I lean the back of the tub. A moment of relaxation.

I reached a tube of scrub and putting a small amount of paste on my palms, I started to scrub my arms. "Do you need help with that...?". I looked up and saw Hans was leaning against the doorway in his robe.